Is it just me, or does every change, and every occurrence in our daily lives depend on time? It has befallen me that too often, every move I make, and everything I do depends on time. Not on my desire to do it, and not on my ability to do it either.
…’If I study part time this semester I won’t be able to graduate for a further six months. If I choose to travel the world for twelve months, I won’t graduate until I’m twenty four instead of when I’m twenty three. I’m twenty-two already – shouldn’t I have some sort of plan mapped out in regards to my career and adult life. I have to start acting like an adult, but what does an adult act like?’… – an excerpt from my thoughts during the past few years.
After asking yourself those questions you start comparing yourself to everyone else’s twenty-two years. They must be a success because they know exactly what they want to knuckle down as a career, they have a significant other half and they’ve purchased their first home. I haven’t an idea of my future, and I don’t necessarily want to do any of that. They must be a success and I must be a failure right?
So, my question – Is success a defined state, or is our perception of success different to everyone else’s? Because I’ve found this unanswered question has messed with my courage to do exactly what I want to do, when I want to do it.
I love to read, and I must say, there are far too many articles that perceive ‘success’ as one sense; your career, your income and family life.
Though this ‘definition’ had kept me stuck for quite some time, I now know that our individual depiction of success is a good thing, as it would mean we are living out our own unique purpose for life.
While ignoring the mediocre, in the box definition of success, (one that revolved around a career and how much money you have secured in your bank account from a young age), I’ve thrown myself into a scary place – a new chapter where vulnerability could indeed get the better of me.
I’ve figured, I was too busy being blinded by my fear of time wasting on my journey to ‘success’, that I disguised it with excuses. From now on, I have sworn that I will slow down, relish in each life lesson, and live in the moment. I’ll do what I believe I need to do for myself, when I want to do it.
Thus, I’ve gone ahead and booked my plane ticket. On the 12th of January 2017, I will be moving to the UK for at least one year, to study, venture and grow as a person.
The mindset that success could only look a certain way is what prevented me from doing this when I first began my studies years ago. When you challenge yourself, you will discover a definition of success that is ideal and true for you, not dependent on another’s situation. You won’t be constantly battling the ups and downs that come along with being in a place that you don’t want in life.
Your baby steps will never be effective if you have a constant expectation that you must be in a better position tomorrow, than what you were today. Don’t seek your purpose from a place that lacks drive, you will more likely be blinded by convincing yourself you need to do something that matters to everyone, that you will struggle to discover what matters to yourself.
Yes, you may not yet have that sense of purpose, but you’re taking advantage of today, in the process of finding it. Simply said, there is no ‘one size fits all’ to figuring out life. Though you are yet to have clarity, your ambition to walk down this dusky path, rather than give in to common expectations is something to be proud of.
There is no set recipe or timeline for venturing the journey of the life that you have chosen…For we all walk a different path, that each goes our own way.
– Haylee x